uh-huh. get a load of this.

MOVING (soon)

2008-09-18T13:51:00.003+08:00

Hello people, shocking annoncement coming up:

I've Decided To MOVE

Visit me at http://mixstix.tumblr.com

I'm not moving immediately, needa have sometime to rough out the edges and stuff, if ya know what I mean.

It's an experimental blog, nothing solid up yet, just managed to tamper around with it and therefore the many many posts in one day (which are gonna be taken down when I've settled down).

But I love it so far! Can post quotes, upload my mp3s, chatlogs, etc. As you can see, I'm trying to be tech-savvy. (What is promote tumblr on blogger right, but oh well.)

Don't ask about the URL, it was the first thing that came to mind.

I'm gonna miss blogger tho :(

ohmygdness

2008-09-09T19:41:00.003+08:00

I totallllyyyy messed it up.

Prelims, I mean.

Today Lit Paper 5, when I was trying my utmost best to generate ideas, this was what was going through my mind:

--> Okay, the connection between memories, Sylvia Plath, and Boey is like owiejrkejsfdsdf
--> King Lear was a tragedy because owekjrkdfjs and in the end he eljre;s ekjr
--> What's wrong with me?
--> The protagonist in the passage is trying to relate to kej;raje skejrs
--> I can't do this anymore

Um, not stressed or anything lah. No, I wasn't swearing either. The gibberish was a representation (Lit is like haunting me) of my uncoherent state of mind. Just couldn't do it. I'm so sorry to all my Lit teachers. I wrote the best I could in that circumstance, but it's not gonna be good enough. Thank God I have another shot at it in the A levels. One more shot only.

Econs Paper 1, 2, Maths Paper 2 and Lit Paper 1 to go.

C'monnnnn...

Same same, but different

2008-08-29T22:22:00.004+08:00

Hello, hello, hello!

Well, it's been a while now, hasn't it.

Basically, have just been mugging. Nothing terrific or particularly electrifying about it, but still. Doing something with my life.

Uhm, PRELIMS in approximately a week's time and I'm trying my utmost best to stay afloat.

It's not an impossible feat, but it's as difficult as they said it would be.

And, I can't believe that I'm almost done with this part of my life already.

Seriously, all those who are considering to go JC, lemme tell you this: JC fast-fowards your life like how Usain Bolt burned up the track. Sorry, lousy analogy, but studying burned up my brains.

Sooner than you know it, we're coming to the end of 2008.

Goodbye world, hello theory of comparative advantage and complex numbers.

2 more months to As

Um.

2008-08-10T14:52:00.002+08:00

I don't like how it is at the back of my mind I know "I have to blog, I have to blog", so here I am, blogging.

So, this what's been going on lately:

Studying most of the time
85 days to A levels
(THE NUMBERS ARE HAUNTING ME EVERYDAY and I can't do anything about it)
School's a draggggggg (dramatic effect, if I may.)
Going to USA for holiday end of this year
(I think, it'd be really apt if I wore one of those "I [heart] NY" shirts over there. You think?)
Thinking about the many many possible reasons why I must study hard
#1 For the people who love/care
#2 'Cos I get to go USA at the end of the year [yes, i know, call me a lucky freak]
#3 Cos i wanna do what i wanna do
#4 Cos i don't wanna screw up again
#5 Cos I know i can do it if i wanna
#6 Cos this is the only time in my life where i get to push myself - and feel accomplished
And then thinking if are all these motivational enough, if not why am I now studying hard enough
Thinking about the many possible courses that I could do in the future (Pretty much wanna go either NTU MassComm or NUS Architecture. But the thought is pretty much over the hill, down the valley, across that bridge, wayyyyyy up after you cross the meadow. In other words, it's far off.)
Which led me to think about the many jobs I could do in the future (I feel that I can do almost anything, right about now)
Which led me to think what Life for me will be in the future
Which led me to tell myself to stop thinking 'cos I needa finish 'A's first. (don't you just hate that when it happens)
Many changes around here these few days.
Happy National Day! (Was cool singing Nat Day songs in school 'cos the past few years' songs just automatically flowed out of my mouth. Kudos to S'pores Patriotism Scheme a.k.a the education system. Not too bad after all :)*
Olympics is cool :D
I imagined myself as one of the competitors, just for fun. (It will not happen in this lifetime)
Everyweek is a tiring week
Weekends with church and all is a good reprieve and then hard to get my momentum back
FRIENDS IS HILLARIOUS. HAHAHAAA. I never knew!

*indicates a double closing-bracket-thingy. If you know the techincal term for it, all the better.

Okay, this is (counting..) SIXTEEN BLOG ENTRIES compressed into one (c'mon, who's da pro) which gives you just about enough compensation for the past month without blogging and then some. Which is kinda better, in a way, if you think about it, 'cos you can pick one bullet point (any one, really, just pick one) and expand on it yourself, and, PRESTO. A blog entry to suit what you would like to read. :D Talk about instant blog entries.

This only took 10 mins to type so don't condemn me for not studying hard! :(

P.S
Sorry for sounding so, erhem, acerbic? It's the weather, lah. Hot cold hot cold.

Since we are on the subject of studying...

2008-07-03T23:52:00.009+08:00

Actually, we're not. We were just on the subject of grades, which is linked to studying.

But any-old-how.

Two Nuggets of Truth

(For myself, at least. But if you wanna make them yours, you can too :D)

#1 You are only as stressed as how much stress you give yourself (I hope that makes sense 'cos today my Engrish a bit the spoil)

#2 I figured, that this time I'm either gonna make it either with or without God.

Having said so, I'd rather me scoring average/lousily for A levels (yes, A levels, you heard me right) and doing it with God

than

to score all As and doing it completely with Him out of the picture.

'Cos I know when I do it with Him, that's gonna land me wherever He wants me to go. And I wanna be in the center of His will, 'cos it's the best place a person can ever want to be.

So there you have it.

Proverbs 16:3

Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.

YOU U

2008-07-03T23:23:00.003+08:00

Sorry for the lag in updates, have been through the torturous Mid-Year Examinations. Draining, difficult, and dreadful.

Okay, maybe overexaggerating.

But to emphasize this point, the other day I was thinking what a U could stand for. (Point of Information: In JC, the grading system goes from A, B, C, D, E, S (Subpass) and U (UNGRADED).

I mean, how can you even mark someone Ungraded when you obviously did grade it? Well, i thought A Big Fat U could stand for: Underachieving, Underperforming, Unsatisfactory, Unheard of, Unacceptable, Unanticipated, UGLY.

But, looking at it in another perspective, it could also stand for: Unafraid, Unashamed ("Lord we know who we are..." Hahah YI people know), Unshaken, Undefeated, Uncompromising, Unconditional (Perseverance) , Unconventional!

I hope my results are like the latter.

And that goes on top of the hope that I don't get a U.

Question

2008-06-19T12:08:00.003+08:00

Father, what does it take to be a person after Your own heart?

"Whatever it takes."

The Smiley Face Phenomenon

2008-06-15T14:03:00.027+08:00

I wonder if you've noticed.

The Smiley Face Phenomenon! Do you not know?

Haha, okay, just being annoying here.

I don't know if it's the stress from studying or is it just the melancholia of the world, but recently, I discovered that all I have to do is to draw a smiley face anywhere (on my hand, on my notes, on my homework) and I immediately feel cheered up.

And through my years of "research", -ahem-, I've discovered that the curvier the smile is, the happier it looks! And I've discovered that different people like to draw their smiley faces differently. Some with two dots for the eyes, some with elongated smiles, some with two parallel lines for the eyes, some with a nose, some with no nose.

Anyway anyhow, I think smiley faces are a wonderful thing, simply for the cheeriness they bring.

And I think another reason for the rise in the use of smiley faces (ohmygoodness that sounds so economics-y) is that people now are losing their joy, losing their hope, losing reason to be happy. But the little smiley face is somehow a sign of how they still cling on to it, and reminds them that somewhere out there, there still might be a reason to be happy.

Mom's a teacher, and she was telling me that there was this one day, to reward a child, she asked this boy in kindergarten whether he wanted her to draw a smiley face. He said, no, I want a sad face.

So sad right!! Where got kids want sad face oneeee. C'mon man, what's the world coming to?

So stop drawing smiley faces and start living out what it stands for!

Sidetrack-which-is-still-quite-relevant-to-this-post:
I think Mr Bean is another epitome of what Smiley Faces stand for, because everytime I pass by it right, I just feel all cheered up inside of me. Haha. I just love everything about it, the cheeriness, the whiteness of the place, the freshness of the soya bean, the everything!

Go and try the soya bean ice-cream, I love it!

Happenings

2008-06-15T12:40:00.004+08:00

Holidays are God-given, I believe from the bottom of my heart.

I'm so sorry I've not been blogging recently, I really know it is quite irritating to go to a page and see the same post again.

Well, this week has been rather eventful, if I may say so myself.

Tuesday and Wednesday brought about an escapade (noun -- a reckless adventure; an escape from confinement or restraint) with Mom, Cheryl and Mom's two friends to our dear neighbour, Johor Baru, Malaysia to attend our church's annual Renewal Camp at Hyatt Hotel. Haha, I wouldn't call it a 'reckless adventure', so to speak, but it was seeing things in a whole new dimension. I mean, once you cross the causeway, it's a whole new dimension in itself, seeing different people in a different place other than Singapore. So near, but yet so different.

Though short, the trip was good, refreshing, and many thoughts got me preoccupied as Ps. Jane Lowder shared and spoke to the church. Not so much regarding the topics she talked about, but more about her life she lived thus far, being about 60 years of age.

And that got me thinking about my own life.

She talked about how she visited Egypt and loved it so much, how she prayed for people in the Philippines, what she did in Indonesia... Though she never emphasized on the miracles, signs, and wonders that took place, what captured me was the spirit of serving God.

Traveling around the world is awesome, but what tops it off is traveling around the world doing God's work.

And when I see people like Ps Preston, Ps Matt Fielder, Ps Paul Geerling and I read about people like Jackie Pullinger and Corrie ten Boom, all these servants of God, I look up to them as godly people who I admire. These people are the ones who let me see the larger-than-life God in them, and cause me to love God more than ever, and I wanna be like them, it's my heart's desire. It's like my last post, my heart just totally wishes I were in their postion.

And yesterday, we had the Amazing Race. It was Amazingly Fun, but Amazingly Tiring as well, and you know the feeling after you had an Amazingly Tiring day, when you get home, you would wanna do nothing else, throw everything aside, and just have an Amazingly Wonderful warm bath, and sleep in the Amazingly Comfortable bed.

That's what my heart's desire make me feel like doing, just throwing everything aside and serve Him and Him alone. Throw everything aside, and spend time with Him and Him alone. Throw everything aside and just listen to Him, be still and know that He is God.

And yet that small part of me knows I still need to take care of my ministries - family, church, studies.

But this reminds me that God's got it all under control:

Isaiah 52:12

But you will not leave in haste

or go in flight;

for the LORD will go before you,

the God of Israel will be your rear guard.

Prayer

2008-06-05T23:54:00.002+08:00

If we really revere God and look to Him as the almighty God, then our prayer life would also follow accordingly.

It will no longer be petty prayers that are motivated by self-benefit like "make the bus come", "I pray that I won't be late" & in doing so treating God like a vending machine.

If we fear God, our prayers will be those that revere Him and honour Him, that acknowledges that He is God above all and that if it is in His will for things to happen, they will happen because He is God Almighty. And knowing so gives us confidence in God for allowing things that happen (or don't happen) and knowing that we can't always have things the way we want them to be.

It gives me the confidence that the Almighty God actually listens to Michelle-sized prayers, and that gives me great comfort.

Thank You, God.

Psalms 66:19-20

...but God has surely listened

and heard my voice in prayer.
Praise be to God,

who has not rejected my prayer

or withheld his love from me!

Anybody?

2008-05-28T14:30:00.004+08:00

I just thought about something the other day -- a magic trick that some random person showed me when I was still a kid and I realised that I have been trying to figure that trick out for years and until now, still haven't got it yet.

So if any of you guys know the secret of the trick, can you please please please please please let me know? It goes like this:

1. You take a rubber band and put it around your wrist
2. Roll it up and down your arm and take it out, it should look twisted all over
3. Take the rubber bands by two ends with your two hands
4. Twist the two sides of the rubber band such that the middle crunches up when you bring your two hands together
5. Pull your hands apart and you should get an un-entangled rubber band!

It's the most frustrating trick I have ever come across 'cos I've never been able to know why is it like that or meet anybody who can tell me why, so if you know why, can you tell me please?

Random thought of the Day:
I think little kids would feel cheated if they learn all the names of the various dinosaurs and learn how to spell the names and watch Jurassic Park and all that, to grow up only to find that dinosaurs were already extinct. -.-

Random musing of the Day:
If someone were to write a book on your life, how many people would read it?
(c.f the Navy commercial where everybody in the cinema fell asleep while watching the movie of the life story of some random guy.)

-Ecclesiastes 12:13-

Now all has been heard;

here is the conclusion of the matter:

Fear God and keep his commandments,

for this is the whole duty of man.

Desire

2008-05-25T13:40:00.002+08:00

You know what's it like to really desire?

It's kinda a strong word.

We were talking about it in Lit class the other day, whether which word is more appropriate. Whether the "want to escape" or the "desire to escape" or the "motivation to escape" is more suitable when writing our essays.

Side-track: 'A's in about 5 months time! :O

And my teacher said that the "desire" for something only comes when it makes us wanna do something about it. Something like that.

I think, desire makes you wanna go out of the place where you are now and doing the thing that you really desire. That when you see that thing, your heart just totally wishes that you were there at that time, instead of where you are at this time. Oh gosh, do you know what I mean?

But no matter what it is, my One Desire needs to be God before I can do anything else. He needs to be the desire of my heart, before I can fulfill any of my other desires. There's something that I really really desire to do, but I know God must top it off, and before I can achieve that, none of the desires I have should take His place.

So, wait, Michelle, wait.

Isaiah 26:8-9b
Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws,
[I] wait for you;
your name and renown
are the desire of [my] heart.
My soul yearns for you in the night;
in the morning my spirit longs for you.

(If you wanna know what's the desire I'm talking 'bout, just ask me :D )

An Exaggeration

2008-05-07T22:42:00.000+08:00

My ulcer is killing me.

Sometimes, Somethings

2008-05-03T09:32:00.002+08:00

I think, some things are just meant for us to look at and marvel at God's creation. No matter how much we try, no matter what we do, we cannot retain these things. They're meant for that time, that place, and that person.

Call me sentimental, but I really believe so.

Like the moon and the stars. I know, common sight. But have you ever seen them at their best? It's like a blanket of sky covered with diamonds, and the moon being enthroned in the sky. It's such a beautiful sight. Especially when at night walking home after a long day, seeing the full moon immediately lifts my spirits.

But have you ever tried taken a picture of this magnificent view? It's virtually impossible. The effect will just be, gone. We can't capture God's awesome creation with man-made cameras. It just won't be the same.

Psalms 8:3-4
When I consider your heavens,
the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
the son of man that you care for him?

And snow! Snowflakes! Have you ever seen the real deal? When everywhere is covered with snow, festive season sets in, and children having fun in the white stuff? Haha, it's really a wonderful sight. Once, I caught a snowflake. It was beautiful. So my mum and I, we tried keeping it in the freezer, at least until winter ended. But it just didn't stay the same, the splendour was gone after a few hours, and no longer what it was before.

I guess the snowflake was meant for me at that time to marvel at, to make me feel loved by God, and not to be insistent on keeping it.

And, I guess, I couldn't ask for more. Thank You, God!

Craving

2008-05-01T02:25:00.002+08:00

I need ice-cream so, so bad..

Namely, Strawberry Cheesecake flavour.

Missed free cone day. There's no denying ice-cream makes a person happy, what's more a free ice-cream? One year one time only lehhhh :(

Strawberry Cheesecake, where are you?

Journal Entry...

2008-04-27T23:15:00.002+08:00

Lord, I need strength for this week. When I look at the coming week, I feel that I'm looking at my Giants. Yes, I feel like a grasshopper. I feel like the Isrealites when they were challenged and confronted by the Philistines.

Yet, I know the outcome of these stories. Yet, I know in my heart that they were more than just stories, but Truths. I need strength to beat these giants, I need strength to get through this week without worrying, without griping about school, without being distracted, and to focus on what I should be doing. I need strength to overcome my own desires to take things easy, and to excel in everything I attempt to do this week.

In a nutshell, I need You.

Numbers 13:30-33

...Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said, "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it." But the men who had gone up with him said, "We can't attack those people; they are stronger than we are... We saw the Nephilim there. We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them."

1 Samuel 17:45-47

David said to the Philistine, "You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied... All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD's, and he will give all of you into our hands."

I take courage in Your word because it is in Your word that I find strength!

Let Me Let You (into my life)

2008-04-15T20:44:00.004+08:00

With this blog, aren't I already?

Just a day of my life for you: Yesterday

Wanted to blog yesterday but was too tired to. But Yesterday was an Interesting Day. I mean, I think it would be a normal day for some, but it was an Interesting Day for me. Why do I say so? Read on. (I can be such a pain, sometimes.)

So Yesterday, I decided to go to Jurong East Library to hang out. Not. To study, 'cos I cannot study at home and I had tons of homework + revision to complete and 'cos I have no school the next day. Oh, the bliss! This is why it was an Interesting Day:

1. When I came out of the ticket gantry at Jurong East MRT station, I saw a secondary/JC boy (he was wearing a light brown uniform. so many light brown these days, how am I supposed to know!) ruuuunnnniiinnngggggg out and down the escalator. Goodness knows rushing to where, I wondered. So you know how there's always pasar malam at both sides of the walkway towards Jurong Entertainment Centre? I saw him later on, queuing up for a Ramly Burger. That made me chuckle. Lol. 'Cos I was wondering what the rush was about and then I found out.

2. Finished my studying and 3 Econs assignments. Library is closing, it's 9pm. So I walk out, and, as usual, pass by the shops in Jurong Entertainment Centre. For some reason or another, there's a lot of people getting their hair cut at this hair salon at this hour. No, that's not what made it Interesting. What made it Interesting was that the hair stylists put a tray of bread open and vulnerable on one of the counters where customers get their hair cut. I was wondering if they like to eat bread full of hair.

3. Journey back home. Grateful to get a seat on the MRT, decided to drop off at Lot One to buy highlighters, then took bus back. So, I got a seat, the one with two other seats facing you. Beside me was this Ah Pek #1. Ah Pek #2 comes on the bus and the bus starts to move off before Ah Pek #2 can sit down. Ah Pek #2 loses balance but just nice, Ah Pek #2 is facing the front of the bus and collapses nicely into the seat beside Ah Pek #1. Both of them burst into a chuckle-laughter (if you know what I mean). And then both hit it off in Hokkien, just like that, despite being strangers. Interesting, no?

All these made up an Interesting Day, plus the fact that I completed all I set out to do that day within those 4 hours, I went home a Happy Michelle, knowing there's no school tomorrow, sleeping contented and thanking God.

Can I have more days like these?

2008-04-13T19:09:00.003+08:00

An 'A' is so straight and upright, the epitome of perfection. Though one letter, it spells hard work, a relentless attitude that never gives up and when recieved, is so rewarding. Getting an 'A' means you're at the top.

A 'B' is curvier, not so perfect, it's the 2nd to an 'A'. And it knows it, too. It's not as straight, not as deserving, not as perfect. All its life it's lived in the shadow of the 'A'. But still, it's better than none.

'C' is nonchalant, can be written with just a stroke of the pen and how easy it is to write it. A 'C' just, is a 'C'.

And for Project Work, I got a 'B'.

My feelings about it are subject to your interpretation.

Hello

2008-04-13T18:35:00.002+08:00

I just wasted my day at home. :(

Jurong East Library is my favorite haunt for now 'cos I study so much more better there but I couldn't wake up in time today to get a good space. So decided not to go because going to Jurong East on Sundays is like going to Yew Tee Macs after school. Filled and filled and filled with students.

Sometimes, I wish I weren't studying. Sometimes in class, I look out the window on the streets and wish I weren't stuck in the classroom. Sometimes, when I stand on a section of the road waiting to cross the pedestrian crossing and see the cars whizz by, I wish I were one of them. Sometimes, I wish too much.

Nah, this isn't an emo post. Blogging is just an outlet for me to express what I'm thinking -- for what it's worth.

I get panic attacks so much more often now. It's not even nearing A levels but I keep thinking: I have no time! I have no time! And then I get (somewhat) determined to mug it like no tomorrow, and then it never happens. Not all the time, though. Last Sunday was spent so productively on arithmetic progression and geometric progression (APGP). But it's so inconsistent. A part of me wants to get this part of my life over and done with and yet another part of me tells me that I need to stay on and discover God's will for me in this period of time.

But still, I can't wait till A level's over!

1001 things I wanna do, I just saw Britain's tourist advertisement on television, it looks absolutely enticing, although I know that it was created to look that way. Plus the pictures of Venice in Lit class. Gossshhhh. I wanna watch a good movie, and just chill out.

So, I have come to a conclusion: Whatever it is, what reasons, what feelings, what problems, what struggles, just study hard. 'Cos my Father's love is enough for me to overcome all of them.

P.S
I don't get what gets to Mr Boey Kim Cheng so much that he describes Singapore HDB life as a "perpetual unrest" with "the endless knockings, / the stampeding feet, the hurricanes of bad temper, / the eternal television, the trashing bodies, / the endless rituals of life and death." I just heard a Malay family chorus a "Happy Birthday" to their little boy at the lift landing and 'tho it was out of tune and flat, it was oh-so-heartwarming. What's wrong with HDB life? I never wanna move into a condo. (Maybe I'll eat my words when I earn big bucks. But for now, that's the way it is.)

P.P.S
Sorry for the long post that strained your eyes and thanks for reading thus far.

So why, exactly, is the sky blue?

2008-03-27T18:45:00.002+08:00

I need to study well and P.W.F.C, J2 is taking a toll on me.

I noticed, that almost everything in this world is not Michellekon-sized. The last time I bought a slice of watermelon for 6ocents at Yew Tee Foodcourt, my goodness, the thing was gigantic. Huge, I tell you. So much juice and I can't eat it properly w/o getting any juice on my face and hands. Haha.

And it's not that I don't eat much, you know. You people think I always don't eat much 'cos of the amount of food that is left over in my plate but have you ever thought my stomach is much smaller than yours (I think)? I eat just what's enough for me 'cos the portions of food is always oh-so-much. Even my uniform is not Michellekon-sized. Why!

Though I seem to be complaining much, I've never looked at myself as too small for this world (at 39kg and 155cm), 'cos I've got a Larger-than-Life God. Have you ever stood far, far away from the MRT station and looked at the people waiting for the train, going down the escalator and walking up and down? They look like ants, man! I'm so in awe of God that though I'm smaller than an ant to Him, yet He lavishes His love on me so, I see His love in my life every single day, no kidding!

Everyday, without fail, I'm reminded of His wonderful, beautiful love in more ways than I can say. And then I have reason to push on, to love the things I hate, to not give up on myself, simply because of this beautiful love.

God, I know you love hearing this as much as anyone else. Father, I love You, I love You, I love You! :)

You mean after 11 years of Chinese education, that's it?

2008-03-04T21:27:00.004+08:00

It was quite sudden. Stealthy, without a trace.
I am, of course, referring to the seizure of the study of Chinese.
I have just come to a realisation that I will never be studying Chinese as a subject again.
I guess it is true, then, that once you've lost something, you'll treasure it much more.

I am sad to say, after just 5 months of not using Chinese (much),

I have lost touch.

It's quite a sad case, since my ethnic race is Chinese. And worse, people tell me I speak Chinese funnily. It's not that I want to, you know! Chinese -- or Mandarin, more specifically -- is a language whereby I feel comfortable speaking in. Really! I'm not kidding!

In the past, I used to live in Ipoh, Malaysia. So in Malaysia, they have Chinese schools, Malay schools, and English schools. My parents, seeing that I had zero knowledge in Chinese, and being the forward-looking parents they were, put me in a Chinese school. Major culture shock. Everybody speaking Cantonese which was alien language compared to Chinese. But being the adaptive me (:D), I picked it up soon enough. Ting Yat Mm Ooi Fan Ohkay! (just kidding)

Maybe it was the experience in Malaysia, where I somehow led the 'kampung' community lifestyle, where everybody spoke Chinese and Cantonese. Maybe it's because I used to have friends who would speak Chinese with me. Maybe it's all of these reasons put together and much more -- Chinese simply makes me feel at home. (I do speak Chinese with my parents at home, FYI.) When I hold a conversation in Chinese with another person, it's because I feel close enough to the person to do so. Doesn't mean I don't talk to you in Chinese so I'm not close to you!

Just that, if circumstances allow, if it's a good chat at night in a familiar heartland coffehouse, or just a simple conversation over a meal, I feel good chatting in Mandarin.

That's why, I am quite sad that I no longer speak/write as fluently (not that I did it very fluently in the past. The keywords are "as fluently".)

I guess all the Civics and Moral Education lessons in primary school about how not to lose our Chinese roots have not gone to waste.

Acronym World

2008-03-04T21:18:00.003+08:00

My Common Test is starting in two weeks and I'm starting to F.T.H. I really think I C.M.I since I'm not consistent in all my tests and assignments and C.S.S when studying :( I hope I will P.W.F.C for all my subjects and not F.M.T.

C.T.A,
Bye

----------------------
F.T.H -- Feel The Heat
C.M.I -- Cannot Make It
C.S.S -- Cannot Sit Still
P.W.F.C -- Pass With Flying Colors
F.M.T -- Fail Miserably Terribly
C.T.A -- Cheers To All

Picture Post!

2008-02-13T22:53:00.020+08:00

You know I've got so much to blog about but once I come to the bloggin page, -blank-. :( Quite sadded by it.

Anyway, decided to do a picture post to fill you in on what's been happening the past few 1000 years I never blogged.

This is how it's like studying in PJC.

This is how I celebrated Christmas. Lol.

This is so amusing, man. Look! They've got Christmas trees and Chinese New Year trees. Lololol!

I love shopping malls like these! :D I found this in KL's Berjaya Times Square.

Clockwise from top-right: The coach that brought us around Malaysia, Along Penang Road, The night scene in Kuala Lumpur and Eating @ Penang's Gurney Drive.

Family Picture against KL's Petronas Twin Towers! From left to right: My sis, Me, Mum, Dad, random group of people who are so eager to take photos with us :\

Finally, someone proposed to me! :O

Nah, I love life too much now to get married.

Back to Blogging

2008-02-13T22:44:00.002+08:00

I have a problem.

And it's very obvious what that problem is.

I can't commit to blogging. :(

I've got a lot a lot of things to blog about! But I guess I really don't have the heart to sit down and type everything out.

Thanks all those who still come back regularly for updates thought it's been about two months.

Look out for more posts!

Let Me Tell You Why:

2007-12-24T14:02:00.000+08:00

I'm just lazy. Read the fine print.

Actually I have thousands of things to blog about but by the time the page loads, the inspiration is just not there anymore. I don't like to wait to pen down my thoughts :( Therefore the arid desert.

Short hair?

2007-11-19T21:13:00.000+08:00

I cut my hair. Again. So sue me.

I don't know what's come over me, cutting my hair so many times. I guess its become an obsession. Haha, no lah, that's an exaggeration. But when the hairdresser was cutting my hair I just kept saying in my head, "Cut more, cut more!"

I think I'm going crazy.

Let me tell you my history with hair.

I've had long hair since I was, about, Primary 2 and never ever cut it 'cos when I was about 6 years old this person cut my hair too short and I cried for 3 days and 3 nights. (Another exaggeration.) Well, I really treasured my hair back then and then was too traumatized to cut my hair short again.

This year, I don't know what's come over me, but one day I looked at my reflection and I decided I was sick of my long hair after so many years.

So I cut it the next day. Talk about being rash.

Some people think short hair doesn't suit me, but what can I do? What's done is done. Do I miss my long hair? Sure I do. I didn't miss it the first few weeks, but now, I'm starting to miss it more and more.

I should just get a move on.

Tribute to 07A06

2007-11-09T11:58:00.000+08:00

It's official.

And it's over.

07A06 will be no more.

I've really really really really enjoyed my time being in this class and I must say, it's one of the most nosiest, unpredictable, enjoyable, fun, LOUDest, craziest, wackiest class I've ever been in. I still can't believe the fact that 07A06 will be no more next year. This is one place where I feel belonged to. These are people with big hearts.

Sorry that I'm not there for most of the outings (like how y'all in town now but I'm at home with a sprained ankle), but know that I really do treasure you guys! It's been a really enjoyable one year in JC1, knowing how worried I was when I stepped into PJC unsure of what the future held but you guys helped in that department so so so much.

This is to us.

'Cos you guys make me happy. Lol.

Shoot my mouth off

2007-11-09T11:39:00.000+08:00

Hello! Gonna be bloggin' about random things today.

Didya know? I have another blog! Hahah I really don't know what's up with me getting another one when I don't even update this regurly, but I'll try my best!

http://more-of-you.blogspot.com

It's my e-Spiritual Journal, I thought it'd be easier to have two separate ones instead of lumping them both together here. Just for me to share my walk with God. Comment there too if you pop by!

I realised, that I was writing more freely before I actually let people see this blog. Now, I don't really write as freely anymore 'cos I guess in my subconscious mind I know that people get to see what I'm writing and therefore am more careful. I dunno. Just something I realised.

And, I can't express how much I love Ribena! I think, that it's the greatest drink ever invented and it's just oh-so-convenient and I love the way it tastes when I drink it when I'm thirsty. I get absolutely refreshed!

That's all for now, folks.

Time = Money

2007-11-06T22:05:00.000+08:00

Yes, it's true!

I mean, the money you spend is proportional to the time you save. In other words, the more money you spend, the more time you save! Heh.

When traveling from one place to another, taking the MRT is cheap, but takes a long time. Taking a taxi is real fast, but you spend way more.

If you want hair extentions, you need to pay more (a lot a lot more) for it. If you're going bald, you have to go to Beijing 101 and pay for it to grow back too. But, if you just let it grow, it takes very longgggg....

If a guy wants to propose to a girl, the bigger the diamond ring, the more the money spent, the faster she'll marry him. 'Nuff said.

Therefore, I conclude, time = money.

Hosanna!

2007-10-10T17:21:00.000+08:00

Just imagine this..

The disciples went and did as Jesus had instructed them. They brought the donkey and the colt, placed their cloaks on them and Jesus sat on them. A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, while others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. The crowds that went ahead of him and those that followed shouted.

"Hosanna to the Son of David!"

"Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!"

"Hosanna in the highest!"

When Jesus entered Jerusalem, the whole city was stirred and asked, "Who is this?"

The crowds answered, "This is Jesus, the prophet from Nazareth in Galilee."

Matthew 21:6-11

Although I came across this verse many times, I read it again today and it took my breath away. Because I could imagine the glory, the triumph when Jesus entered Jerusalem. I could imagine if I were in the crowd, surely I would be ecstatic! Jesus needed no finery or trumpets or grand horses. He himself was enough, "gentle and riding on a donkey on a colt". He came in a way that was humble but yet the people shouted "Hosanna!" and blessed his name, welcoming the King of kings and Lord of lords, praising Him and exalting him.

Wow.

P.S
'Hosanna' is a Hebrew expression meaning "Save!" which became an exclaimation of praise.

Ready.. and, ACTION

2007-10-10T16:48:00.000+08:00

"All the world’s a stage and the people are merely actors."

Shakespeare couldn't have said it better.

Ever noticed? People just go through day by day acting in their own drama serial, but it's never them. Laugh in school, cry at home. Every day, it's just a cycle that they go through for the sake of it.

And then they ask what's the meaning of life. Ha, the irony of it.

I think, sometimes, that people just enjoy fake-ness and superficiality. The drama serial at the end of the day is just, fake tears, acting and lives that are not real. And keeps us entertained -- hooked, even. We enjoy acting with each other, involved in each other's plays and sometimes go a step further into feelings. Relationships are not based on the person; they are based on popularity, on what the person can offer, they are based on money.

Maybe the fake stuff is a cover up. That would explain plastic surgery, fight between beauty and slimming centres. It's a cover up for how bad you feel inside. If you look good on the outside, maybe, just maybe, you're the same on the inside. And maybe, just maybe, you're happier. You have self confidence, you have what it takes. People look up to you. That's how you measure happiness?

We've all learnt that that's not true.

People chase after their empty dreams, wanting to be Cinderella, the swan after being the ugly duckling, being the star they always wanted to be, but in the end, these dreams are just empty. Empty, empty, empty.

And love? What is love? I'm disgusted by the way love has evolved into lust. Talk about PDA. You see it blatantly on the MRT nowadays, it's not a taboo anymore. In fact, it's a trend. I wonder, how are parents supposed to explain or protect their children anymore.

Love is supposed to be sweeter than that.

A mother giving up her job to take care of her children. A father who puts his children's photographs on his desk in his office. An elderly couple still holding hands in the park. A husband who never forgets their wedding anniversary. That is love. Sure, it isn't exciting, but it lasts.

We always think about satisfying ourselves, then others. Because of what we want, we've lowered our standards. Way, way, way low. (Ever seen those low rise jeans?)

It's all an act. Why can't we keep it real?

P.S
I'm not emo, just a passing thought. :)

Uniquely Singapore

2007-10-10T16:11:00.000+08:00

I love the Singapore life, I can't imagine to be anywhere else on this earth.

Where else can you get hawker centres where the uncles and aunties shout across the entire place just to order some coffee? (I don't really know what they shout though.) Although sometimes it's oily and sticky, but I just love the way people gather and just have a simple lunch over good Singaporean food, the sound of frying and clattering of plates. It's just all so homely.

I love it when I feel safe in the public buses at night, when I sleep in my room and I can hear the bus just quietly drive past, and knowing that everything is still consistent and I'm safe in my bed.

I don't show it, but I love to observe the people around me on the MRT. I've always had a fascination of thinking how their lives are from the things they carry, from the way they dress, from the way they talk on the phone, and guessing if they, like me, had a late night before when they try to catch forty winks on the train. The steady train's movement is just so calming, look out and sometimes I would be able to spot a nice view of a river, look at the people walking below, just let my thoughts wander.

I love being at Choa Chu Kang Interchange and Yew Tee MRT station because that's when I know I've reached home after a long day in school or after somewhere tiring. Seeing how the busdrivers talk to each other and people young and old gathering gives a sense of familiarity. And there will always be the makeshift ice cream stall who sell ice cream super cheap.

HDB flats was where I grew up in, from two-room, to five-room, to executive and I always love how I know that I'm where I'm supposed to be no matter where I am in Singapore; they give me a sense of security.

I like the feeling where I step out on a Sunday afternoon and there are people playing in the basketball court, turn to your left and you see a small girl roller blading under the void deck, and a few kids playing badminton. It gives me assurance to know that although the education system is tough, but it's not taking a toll on students here.

Festive occassions are the best -- Christmas lights in Orchard Road, the bright colours of lanterns and candles in the park, food and visiting during Chinese New Year, and so much so much more.

I feel sorry for the tourists who come to the Zoo (which exploit them of their money just 'cos they're angmo. Did you see how much one zoo ticket costs?!), the birdpark and underwater world, leaving Singapore sweating profusely (it's too hot, they say) and thinking that that's all to it. But there's so much more, things they don't see, things that only Singaporeans know and identify with.

I'm glad I'm not anywhere but here :)

Worship

2007-10-07T18:48:00.000+08:00

I love the feeling of my fingers being able to be free on the keyboard and just expressing my love to God on the keyboard. It just feels so free. I guess that's why they call it 'free worship', because you are not only not limited within a song but you also feel so free. Wow. Refreshing. And after I played, I prayed:

Lord, every song I lift to You;
Praises of You are like honey on my lips,
So sweet and yet so precious
That everytime, once I've tasted it, I long for more
I yearn to linger in Your presence.
For it is You that leads me by still waters
And lets me rest under Your wing.
Almighty God!
I declare Your name!
So that people may hear, and will know,
That You are my God who delivers,
Who has mercy.
Never failing and undying is Your love
That lasts for a thousand generations.
I fear You, Lord
But yet, I want to draw nearer to You.
God, You are my Lord
Creator of the Heavens and the Earth!
No one can comprehend Your worth.

Sure, although some lines are taken out of the bible and some taken out from songs, each line is what I really mean and put together, they make my own personal song to the Lord.

And who says you need a melody to have a song? I have one in my heart. ♫

Don't Know What to Blog About

2007-10-06T23:41:00.000+08:00

Title tells all.

Life after Promos have been rather, what's the word, productive-less. If there's ever such a word.

Actually, I have tons to blog about 'cos I've got tons of thoughts that I've had recently that I think people can identify with but, now, they're all gone. So that explains why I haven't been blogging even though Promos have been over since one week ago. For me, writing must be a on-the-spot thing after I've gathered my thoughts, if not, the feeling won't be there anymore. Talk about writer's block.

What my thoughts are right now:

I love God. I love spending time with Him.
One day, I wanna travel the world.
I need to know how to drive. (I can't stand being stranded and being so helpless anymore.)
I think that the division between neighbourhood and elite schools is quite crap.
Why people won't bother bending down for a 5-cent coin anymore?
I love watching TV but it kinda sucks the life out of me after that.
I kinda like studying now. Studying ≠ Mugging.

Haha. Shall do a proper post soon. Cheers to all.

P.S.
Sorry I know it's kinda irritating to see a down-dated (opposite of up-dated) blog for one month now, but will try to update regularly from now on!

In Between Tasks

2007-09-11T20:47:00.000+08:00

In between tasks, I take time out to talk and listen to God:

Lord, so often I've wondered
If I've said the right thing
Or given the right advice
Or prayed enough
Or read Your word enough
Why am I always so uncertain?
"Child, nothing you could do
Would never be 'enough'.
Leave yourself alone
And delight in me."

I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God
-Isaiah 61:10

It's not all always about the highs, how much life is wonderful with God and all, but I do have my uncertain moments too. But that's what keeps it real, doesn't it? God doesn't want me to be perfect, He wants me to make mistakes, wants me to fall, He wants me to listen to Him and move on. That's what causes growth.

Sometimes, I feel so overwhelmed by the pressures of life and time but listening to what God has to say and just knowing that He is there keeps me going.

God, You are my best inspiration.

Title-less Post

2007-08-22T20:20:00.000+08:00

I'm so proud of myself 'cos now I'm blogging regularly. But this also means I come online regularly which is not good too. I'm gonna stop coming so regularly when Promos are dead near.

Which is actually, like, now, but anyhow, I'm here already so might as well blog.

So it's a title-less post 'cos I don't really have a title for this as I'm gonna blog just about happenings and thoughts going through my mind lately.

Firstly, prayer meeting today was so awesome, God's presence was just there in the room in the midst of 12 people and I can testify today that when "two or three come together in [God's] name, there [He is] with [us]". Matthew 18:20 And for those who were there today, never give up in finding that promised land with breakthrough alright! I just looooovvve it when all of God's people come together and worship Him wholeheartedly, God never fails to turn up. Awesome God! And to think that I was worried because the previous day I had no idea what to say, but God always turns up when I cry out to Him and voila! I had an awesome time in His presence.

Secondly, Mrs Beh (my literature teacher for Pride & Prejudice) said something today that got me thinking. Haha, it's actually not some deep philosophy or anything, but she was actually trying to illustrate how it would feel like for Darcy to propose to Elizabeth so she asked us to imagine Prince William/Harry/jksldjfskd (I can't remember which) came to Pioneer Junior College and come up to one of us saying that he saw our face on facebook and wants to marry now.

To be honest I actually imagined that happening to me, and I actually thought what I would do. You know, as you grow older, the idea of the future keeps coming, and marriage is definitely one of them (don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about).

I think most girls would definitely wanna marry a rich guy so we girls don't needa work for the rest of our lives and play mahjong with ten gold rings on our ten fingers, watied on hand and foot. Discover the taitai in you!

But when I put myself in that situation when Prince jksldjfskd wants to propose to me (LOL I can't believe I actually imagined the whole thing out), I would say a straight 'NO'. Because the first thing that would come into my mind would be 'I can't go to church anymore', and then 'What about my family?' and "I won't be able to stay with my parents anymore" and "I won't ever learn how to drive 'cos I will have a chauffeur" and "I won't be able to praise God freely at home any longer" and "I won't be able to see my brothers and sisters in Christ as frequent any more".

So who cares about Prince jksldjfskd? I wanna live my life the way God planned it out to be. :D

Monday Blues

2007-08-20T18:56:00.000+08:00

Which of you got fooled by my really (x100) post huh? Own up own up!

I admit I'm not a faitful a blogger as some are, but at least I try. Aren't I blogging right now? And it's not even a month yet!

Well I'm here to say my thoughts about Monday Blues, what most of us have when Monday comes.

Actually if you come to think of it, Sunday has a different feel to it too. Maybe it's only at my house but come Sunday, everything just feels so Sunday-ish. If you get what I mean please comment. But you just know that it's a Sunday, and the next day will be a Monday. Maybe it's 'cos of the Sunday Night Movie on Channel 5 that contributes, or maybe even the fact where everything just feels so Sunday.

So, the next day is Monday.

And everybody, on the train to work and to school, is quiet.

Sometimes, if you notice, you see their downturned mouths, their furrowed brows while they try to take forty winks while the train moves steadily down the track. (And if look even more carefully, you can see the oily scalp prints against the clear window thingys at the side. EWWWW)

Monday Blues strike again. Everybody's wanting to be anywhere but here.

The train stops at Yew Tee MRT station, the woman's warm voice, which contrasts so much with the mood at that time, announces the arrival and Miss Kon steps in light-footed, light-hearted and humming a praise song tune she sung last Saturday in youth group at church (Song: Only One for Me). Her face is different from the rest, not frowning, not complianing, but actually looking forward to go to school. She'd just heard from God the previous night and now, refreshed by His word, was all set for that week's challanges. Monday Blues, Yellows, Reds, Whites or Blacks don't bother her at all.

Her focus is on God.

I always tell myself I have the joy of the Lord, and He provides according to His glorious riches, and strength is definitely one of His provisions. So, you know, when Monday comes, it's hard being joyful when the mood is somber and everybody's not smiling. But when the focus is on God, it takes my vision off my surroundings and onto Him. It's so much easier, I feel so much stronger and revived to start this week together with Him.

Gosh, I'm so glad I have God.

FINALLY

2007-08-17T11:42:00.000+08:00

Finally... a new post!

Hahaha I'm so so sorry everyone. I know how it feels like to go somebody's blog and see the same:

really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really

everytime you come and get sick and tired of it alreally - i mean already.

So. Nothing much to say, this post just to tell you guys that I've been really really really really (haha) busy this few weeks with tests and all. So took some time out to actually blog today.

P.S. Just wanna thank all YOU GUYS for tagging/commenting/whatever else 'cos you guys really do make my day! Haha thank God for you guys!

Stand Tall and Stand Proud!

2007-08-17T11:16:00.000+08:00

Just half a year into blogging and I've realised how difficult it is to maintain a blog and understand why people just stop blogging. It's not that it's a burden or extra to do, it's just difficult to maintain. I wonder if I'll ever stop blogging one day. Hmm.

Well, I'm off topic again.

People make good-natured fun of each other when we don't meet up to 'ideal standards' and therefore, many times, my height gets poked fun at. Yea for your information I'm 155cm ever since ever. But in actual fact, I don't really mind 'cos I think the worse off people are those who are tall.

I've come across some really tall people in my life and if you do notice carefully, these tall people always have a tendency to hunch or slouch. I don't know for sure but it seems to me that tall people just don't like all the attention that they're getting.

But then again, there are tall people who are really confident of themselves; they are able to stand tall and accept the fact that they are tall. Have you ever seen Yao Ming slouching?

My point is, that no matter what you have, be content with it. The grass is always greener on the other side, for the whole of your life. Quote Pastor Daniel: Girls with naturally straight hair wants to perm their hair, girls with naturally curly hair want to rebond their hair. And from my point of view, people who are short forever want to become tall and people who are tall hate the uneccessary attention that comes with it. People in this school forever wanna be in another school, people with sisters always want brothers and people with younger brothers always want an older brother. People who are single wanna get married and people who are married wanna become single again.

People who are not happy with their faces wanna go for plastic surgery and people who are not happy with their skin color, bleach it. In the end, they end up like Micheal Jackson, his body is falling apart. (Nobody talks about him now, you've realised. The last time I heard his name was at the canteen's drink stall where they sell chin chow mixed with soya bean and named it after him. Go figure.)

Yea, you get the picture.

I was once like that before, I always told everybody that my ideal height would be 165cm, but I'm past that stage now. Being 155cm is part of my identity, it's what makes me, me. Can you imagine Miss Kon being 165cm? It just won't be the same.

So, be happy with what you have, God made you in His own image and if you change any of that, you're telling Him that His standards are not good enough.

So take it from Yao Ming, accept who you are and make the best out of it. It's called self-esteem.

P.S.
Lengthiest post in the longest time, sorry if it's a bit boring but yea, that's what's on my mind recently. -Gasp- I've just realised that it's been almost a month since I've posted. Real sorry! And, also, am wondering is my blog too boring with all words and no pictures (except of the spastic one of me on the top right corner, haha). Shall do a picture post soon!

I'm Gonna Dedicate A Whole Post to This

2007-07-23T21:45:00.000+08:00

I don't usually post about un-important stuff ,as you know, time is of the essence. So this is rather important.

People, COMMENT! That's what the comment button is for.

I would really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really wanna hear your views on any issue 'cos what I post is what I really am thinking about. (Yeah, I copy-pasted that.)

So even if you're just passing by, comment!

If you're here everyday, comment!

If you're an old friend I haven't talked to for ages, comment!

If you don't know me well, comment!

If you're a random person/my teacher/someone I saw today at Lot One/the person selling tissue, comment!

If you love me, comment!

If you hate me (I doubt anyone does), comment!

Especially if you share the same sentiments as me, please do comment!

To sum it up/In conclusion/In a nutshell (consequence of doing too many GP essays), COMMENT!

LOL. Thanks. Sorry, random mood today.

P.S.
You don't know how much I appreciate comments and tags! hahaha I think it's a post-blog syndrome.

Nissi Salt-ers Listen Up!

2007-07-23T21:24:00.000+08:00

Yeah, I know what you must be thinking.

"Every time she wait so long to post then so long never update, once she post then post so much."

But I can't help it, yeah? I like being on blog-binges. (Miss Kon coined that word, thank you very much.)

Anyway, that's beside the point. As usual.

My point today is FOR ALL YOU NISSI SALT-ERS OUT THERE! This is my prayer for you, as I was doing my quiet time, I prayed this prayer for me and every single one of you. So read up good. :D

My prayer to God today was to have:
Not superficiality, but sincerity & honesty
Not fear of the unknown, but fear that You would leave me
Not love of the world, but faithful love for You
Not remembering my debtors, but remembering that You died
Not just merely saying, but living & doing as much as I'm alive and kicking
Not influenced by what other people think or say of me, but live to make You proud
Not just filling my stomach with food, but reviving my spirit with the Word of God
Not giving up on Your people, and neither would I give up on You.

And I prayed that would be the same to every one of my beloved nissi salt-ers out there.

That's God's people. They do so much more than what is expected of them.

Ain't that right, God's people?

P.S.
Let's hear a shout-out for GOD!

Little Things Show a Whole Lot

2007-07-22T22:30:00.000+08:00

I really meant to blog.

I really did.

Just that my good old pal, time, didn't allow me to.

Hmph.

(And yeah, didn't have anything much to blog about. You wanna hear about my life meh.)

Anyway, passing thought today that you might wanna chew on -- small things show a whole lot about a person's life.

Let's take for example: rough paper. I always use rough paper for Maths 'cos I'm really a perfectionist at heart and I don't wanna scribble my workings all over my foolscap and hand it up so I do the whole exercise on rough paper then transfer it over. Okay, that's not the point. But the kind of rough paper a person uses really tells a great deal about a person.

Currently, my rough paper is:

Chord Sheets (Solution)

Phonics related stuffs

Nissi Two worskshop misprinted pages

Project Work GPP template

Okay, now you know I print chords out to play on my guitar/keyboard, my parents run a business that involve teaching little kids how to read (you don't know the din they make on Saturday mornings), that I really enjoy creating and printing out stuff for church or anything for that matter, and I have too much project work stuff that I used it to scribble on a geography mindmap about deep weathering, karst landscapes and granite landforms (Geog Can Kill).

My Chinese teacher's rough paper is about property and stuff 'cos her husband is a real estate agent.

I went to study with Tiffany today and her rough paper is lots and lots of bible study materials, which show what her parents do.

Sometimes, my friends' rough paper is their parents accounting sheet stuffs.

So, you know, you can really tell a person's background by looking at their rough paper. It's all a matter of observation, really. Just like the classic example -- if Bill Gates uses dollar notes as his toilet paper, it shows he's filthy rich (pun intended).

So, little things show a whole lot.

Post(random)-script:
What's the rage about Harry Potter? I just don't get it.

Public Transport Bloopers

2007-07-05T19:59:00.000+08:00

I take public transport almost every other day. Most of the time, traveling time is used to think, to just let your thoughts wander, subconsciously or consciously, or just leave your mind blank and look out the window. But there are a few mistakes I would never wanna make taking public transport.

The Classic
Carrying NTUC plastic bags full of groceries and stepping out of a freezingly cold air-conditioned bus with my specs on and later finding them going all misty and also finding myself frustrated 'cos I can't take my specs off to wipe them with my hands full. Go around looking like a dork.
(Point of information: Yes, I wear contact lens so this doesn't really happen to me but it did once!)

The Clueless
When the taxi driver uncle ask me which route I wanna take by CTE, PIE, KJE or SLE and whether wanna pass the place with ERP and he rambles on about the rising GST and complain about the PAP. Number one, I don't know the roads well if not I'll jolly well be the one driving (you don't know how much I wanna drive!) and number two, sometimes taxi drivers keep on going without ever ending.

The Plain Stupid
Holding my handphone and smsing or reading a book or my notes (how diligent I am! my classmates call me Mugger Michelle), not noticing what is in front of me and taking a big step into where everybody is heading downwards and expect the escalator to move, only to realise it's the staircase.
(Point of information: It did happen before, the waiting for it to move part.)

Don't laugh at me okay. I'm sure you had your share of public transport bloopers too.

God-Freak

2007-07-03T19:43:00.000+08:00

Studies, to others, might be about acheiving.
But to me it's about perservering.

Running, to sportsmen, may be about building up or training to be the best athlete around.
But to me it's about determination, pushing myself to my limit.

Failure, to other people, may be not measuring up to the other's standards.
But to me, to fail is to not put in my best and do it with my greatest ability, no matter I score below 50 or get bronze for NAPFA.
Cos that's how people define 'pass' or 'good'.

People work hard to get the pat on the back or material rewards but I chiong my guts out to see that smile on God's face. :) I'm so glad God put me in this school where I can really concentrate on my studies & attempt at giving my best back to God.

You may call me a God-Freak, but lemme tell you something else:
That's exactly what I am.

New Post In Two Months

2007-07-03T19:27:00.000+08:00

I'm so glad that you (yes, you) do visit! I was so afraid that this blog was gonna be a flop because it isn't really about my daily life and stuff so I think people won't bother to read. But all you guys who tagged proved otherwise so thanks so much! :D

(Don't think I don't know you skipped the whole chunk of lengthy posts because you're lazy to read though.)

Anyways, please do leave comments after posts (although I know how lazy you are to click that button and another window pops up) if you feel that you so strongly agree with me or otherwise. Cos I would really like to hear from you too! But if you're really that lazy then nevermind lor.

So now you know I have a blog, I won't hide anymore how difficult it was setting it up because I didn't want anyone to know (yet), so I spent like one hour figuring out how to insert the tagboard into the sidebar and everything and the layout was all over the place so I went to blogger help and learn how to justify and html and everything else you can think of. I couldn't ask anybody too! So this explains why the layout is nothing much. Yeah so now you know. Miss Kon hides very well. Half a year leh! Not bad eh.

At least now I understand why people keep bugging me for tags, because I'm doing it to people now too.

Two Things I Really Wanna Do Currently

2007-05-08T00:07:00.000+08:00

With EVERYTHING that has been going on in my life, I've come to realise that no matter how insignificant we may seem, there's still life's pleasures to be found in the midst of all the busy-ness, troubles and worries.

Okay, I'm just trying to sound intelligent.

But you gotta admit, if you read that carefully, you just might find some truth in it.

Alright, on to my main point. Two things I really feel like doing:

1. To be able to lie on a patch of green grass (a large patch of green grass) facing the sky and spotting shapes of the clouds. I can just imagine doing that now. How relaxing.

2. To be able to go around Singapore and taste all the good food, no matter where. Be it stalls by the roadside, you know those which have makeshift tables at the side, or shophouses which sell great pastries and desserts. And consequently, I really hope to have a good vaccation with good food and great places to go!

All these I wanna do, of course, with someone I'm really close to. Can be family, friends, anyone. I'm a firm believer of good food with good company makes a great combination and an unforgttable time.

Cheers to those unforgettable times to come.

P.S.
I'm not overwhelmed with the workload that I want a break. I just feel that I really wanna enjoy life the way God gave it to me. And most people think enjoy life = at home eat sleep play computer slack. I'm taking 'enjoying life' to a whole new level.

I'm sorry I'm kinda rambling but thoughts just come as I write/type. I guess that's the main cause to why people ramble.

There I go again.

Speaks to Me

2007-04-14T01:33:00.000+08:00

These lyrics are so real, and speak so much to me, what I really wanna tell God:

V1:
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is, it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

C:
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your Majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your Holiness
Word of God speak

V2:
I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

You know that kinda feeling where you can be surrounded by crowds of people and yet still feel empty and lonely inside? God is the answer. Among the storm, where your surroundings seem to just be so hectic and messy and sucks all the life out of you, you still can have joy and feel positive about everything else. That's when you know God's carrying you on His shoulders. That's when you know that God is the one sustaining you, supporting you. That's when you can be still, and know He is God.

Indescribable.

Just a little something for You

2007-04-10T20:23:00.001+08:00

Sing a sweet song unto the Lord, because He hears
Lift your hands high unto the Lord, because He sees
Bow your heads in reverence & in prayer to God, because He hears, He listens
Give your offering of words, praise & honour unto the Lord, because He deserves
Take off your masks before Him, come to Him as your are, because He looks within
Cast all your cares & burdens before Him, because He sustains
Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind & strength, because He first loved us.
10.04.07

My soul finds rest in God alone;
My salvation comes from Him
He alone is my rock and my salvation
He is my fortress, I will never be shaken
-Psalms 62:1-2

Even as I start on the topic of literature and also marvel at the wonders of it, how can I forget the Creator of it? Literature is so beautiful, and what else can I use it for except to give praise to the Almighty God? Who put everything in place? Who set the stars where they are for us to admire? Even as I study, I don't wanna waste it. But I wanna give it as offering unto the Lord.

You are God in heaven
And here I am on Earth
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus I am so in love with You

Welcome to JC Life

2007-03-21T19:25:00.000+08:00

OG, MEL, lectures, tutorials, GP, PW, H1 & H2, EoM, I&R, long queues at CCK interchange, bus 190, short skirts and big shirts, CTs, STs & LTs, long breaks, 07A06, Good News Cafe, GO, concourse, canteen, econs has direct relationship with catch no ball, notes, notes & more notes, CCAs, rush, rush, rush.

That, basically, is the summary of my life in PJC. Suprisingly, I'm adapting.

Looking Forward

2007-03-01T13:17:00.000+08:00

At every point of time in your life, you are surely looking forward to something.

An old grandma living in the old folks’ home. She is looking forward to Sunday where her grandson comes to visit her, to hold her hand. That touch that gives the reassurance that she can count on him whenever she needs him. She looks forward to the kiss he plants on her forehead towards the end of his visit, telling her that he will be back next Sunday. She spends the whole week looking forward to the next Sunday that he will come again.

A student in the classroom. He is staring at the clock mounted against the cold, hard concrete wall of the classroom, looking at the seconds tick by and wondered why does 60 seconds take so long to pass. His thoughts drown out the teacher’s droning and his mind is on all the things that he is going to do after school.

A girl after her first date. She is watching TV on the couch with her handphone beside her but not really paying attention to the programme at all. Talk about xin bu zai yan. The movie is the weekly late-night horror movie, but she is smiling to herself and looking forward to the time where her boyfriend would call her. She takes a glance at her handphone every few seconds, but not trying to be too obvious. The boyfriend calls and they chat for 2 and a half hours, she puts down the phone with a mega-watt grin she couldn’t hide even if she tried, looking forward to her next date.

An accountant working for the bank. Work starts to pile higher and higher, he’s up to his neck in all the accounts that needs to be worked out. Why, he sleeps with numbers dancing in his head and don’t ask him to count sheep because that’s the last thing he would do. For this fella, he’s looking forward to that vacation in the Bahamas together with his wife; he can almost feel the sand in between his toes right now, the feel of the cool, blue sea against his skin and the breeze playing with his hair. The diving suit has his name written all over it. He can almost hear all these lifeless things beckoning to him. Just you wait and see, he was going to indulge himself.

Maybe you are one of them, maybe you are not. But all of us look forward to something at any point of time in life. Maybe you might be looking forward to the next episode of Prison Break (will they ever get out?). Maybe you are looking forward to the posting of your new school. Maybe you’re looking forward to what the future may bring, what God has in store. Maybe you are looking forward to 10 years later, what would you become? Who would you be with? Most importantly, did you get your driver’s license after your first try to prove all those stinkin’ guys WRONG? Well, that’s all I am looking forward to.

But I know that I have a big God who won’t disappoint me maybe like how that grandson would disappoint his grandma after starting a family, neglecting her, and even found her a nuisance. Or that student who played too much until he failed all his tests. Or that girl, the boyfriend found her too clingy and broke up with her, leaving her heart-broken. Or the accountant at the bank, after his holiday he came back with even more and more work that sleeping 4 hours a day is too much!

Man will disappoint but God never fails, I’m glad I have someOne that I can lean fully on so that I will not worry even if my whole world comes crashing down.

God, I’m glad I have You.

Thought of the Day

2007-02-21T18:55:00.000+08:00

Was just reading through my friendster bulletins and I realised I've got so much crap of those chain letters where "if you don't repost/forward this in 200 secs YOUR BROTHER* WILL DIE".

I can just imagine it now. Me standing beside my brother's* coffin, sobbing my eyes out and people around me patting my shoulders, offering their condolences. So many thoughts would be going through my head and then I would finally wail, "I SHOULD HAVE REPOSTED THAT DUMB BULLETIN! NOW HE'S GONE!"

Goodness gracious, what has this world come to.

*I was using 'brother' as an example because I don't have one and no matter how un-superstitious I am, I don't wanna curse my family members.

Soccer

2007-02-04T23:51:00.000+08:00

Hello all. There is an unwritten rule that girls should not be discussing about this topic because they know nuts about it. Make a guess.

That's right. SOCCER.

In normal circumstances, I wouldn't have stayed on the channel showing a soccer match for more than 10 seconds. But this time round (blame the patriotic blood in me), Singapore is competing against Thailand for the ASEAN championship, so how could I not watch it, being the loyal Singaporean I am? Okay, ignore the times I merely mouthed the national anthem. There are worse people around me! AND I did sing it out of willingness in my last few months in school, serious.

So yeah. Back to the point. Watching soccer is... interesting. Though I may not know all the technical terms and all, but at least I know who is in posession and know when to shout "REFEREE KAYU!!" Okay, so I shouted that just for fun.

And sometimes, I don't know if I'm watching soccer or...

Bowling

The first leg I watched, the Thais went down like bowling pins one by one. So many people fell over. And over. And over and over.

Badminton

The ball just went to and fro and to and fro.

Ballet

Did you see how high their legs went (and not to mention how pointed their feet were) when they kicked the ball high in the air?! My goodness. And the splits they can do. Scary. I can almost picture them against some railing in a room full of mirrors.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not against soccer. I understand the adrenaline rush when they step on the field, the determination to fight and conquer and bring back the trophy, the ecstatic feeling when a goal is scored, the togetherness and fighting spirit. I know that any sport is much more than it seems. But it's just that as an onlooker, it's so much more funnier.

Laugh out loud.

It's Ironic

2007-02-04T03:08:00.000+08:00

There are so many ironies of life. Here's one of them:

Isn't it ironic that the most useful things we learn or skills we acquire that we can apply in our life are learnt in primary school? And that as we get promoted to secondary school, the things we learn get more and more useless? At least, more useless than what we learn in primary school.

In Primary School...

#1 We learn how to read the time
How useful is that? How useless would you be if you don't know how to read the time? Very useless. You would be either running late or early all the time. How useless would you be if you don't know how the exponential graph looks like? Not very useless. No loss at all, I would say.

#2 We learn how to count
If your name were Adam, how else would you know the Benny cheated you of 4 apples that you got from Charlie instead? You won't be charged more by the uncle selling chicken rice, too. That's a plus.

#3 We learn profit, gain and percentage
How useful! In primary school we can buy 10 packets of the 10cent/packet seaweed and sell it to that kid who never steps out of class at a profit of 5cents and then proceed to the bookshop to buy a new colour of shaker mechanical pencil when we've earned enough. Then in secondary school, it's an advantage to calculate how much marks we can afford to lose if we just want to pass, and how much is 75% so we can barely get that A1.

See my point now? Okay, maybe I'm manupilating everything so I can prove my point, but seriously, don't you feel that the higher you go in education, the less practical it gets?

Beauty is in the Eyes of the Beholder

2007-01-30T13:20:00.000+08:00

Click here to see why our idea of beauty is so distorted.

Dove is stepping out to promote real beauty, so am I.

Don't you feel tired all the time trying to suit your body according to what the world thinks is 'beautiful'? How many of us here are truly, honestly and sincerely satisfied with the way we look?

The latest nip/tuck commercial:
Does having a ugly face make you hideous
Does having a fat body make you monsterous
Sometimes the real monsters are the ones behind a beautiful exterior

Someone on national television claimed that she "didn't believe in natural beauty". So is that how its like now these days, no such thing as natural beauty?

How many times in school people get made fun of because of the way they look? Stick and stones may break my bones, but words hurt even more than stones.

Too tall, too short, too thin, too fat, no double eyelids! Too fair, too dark.

Work out, work out, work out. Exercise to get that great body! Use the sharp end of a comb to draw out double eyelids and you'll get them in a month. Slather tanning lotion all over your body. Slimming centres, weight management, struggling to keep up with what the rest expects of you.

Anoreixa, bullemia, depression. Slit writs, legs. Feel like nobody cares.

I wonder why people get stressed with the amount of work and all, but nobody gets stressed with the ever-increasing standards the world has set for beauty.

But I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow

Let's get this ball rolling.

2007-01-04T17:44:00.000+08:00

Hi there!

I'd never think that there would be this one day where I would get a blog. I practically vowed (ok, technically I can't) never to give in to this blog revolution, but whaddya know? Things happen.

So, yeah. This just to set the record straight. This blog is for anything under the sun. And this is for thoughts, controversies, feelings, things I feel that are worth mentioning, and just plain, ol' ramblings.

So there you have it.